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My mind recently has been kept under lock and key as I have found that if I leave it open, all of the thoughts, voices, and images of the day and prior ones will trickle through rather agonozingly, and leave me exposed to whatever emotion takes me at that moment. Because of all the things that have been happening here recently in the past two weeks it has been rather nice to numb out from the rational side of it all. Today however..*sighs* it has all come crashing down on me and has left me reeling in the aftershock of all I have chosen to ignore. Now of course I am in a quandery as to how to deal with ANY of the situations that I am faced with, and so I sit here befuddled and aching...longing for the friend that has walked away. Ironically ALSO one of the "issues" put at bay. So if in the event I seem strung out and bewildered...dont be cross with me..I am there with you...and more than likely in hopes the sound of your voice will drown it all out.

In every heart there is a room

A sanctuary safe and strong

To heal the wounds from lovers past

Until a new one comes along



I spoke to you in cautious tones

You answered me with no pretense

And still I feel I said too much

My silence is my self defense



And every time I've held a rose

It seems I only felt the thorns

And so it goes, and so it goes

And so will you soon I suppose



But if my silence made you leave

Then that would be my worst mistake

So I will share this room with you

And you can have this heart to break



And this is why my eyes are closed

It's just as well for all I've seen

And so it goes, and so it goes

And you're the only one who knows



So I would choose to be with you

That's if the choice were mine to make

But you can make decisions too

And you can have this heart to break



And so it goes, and so it goes

And you're the only one who knows.







Billy Joel ~And so it goes~